the amazing adventures of jen14221

boston bound

We're off to Boston this morning.  Peter needs to be back mid-week so he's driving home alone.  Will and I are spending a few extra days and flying the surprisingly affordable JetBlue back home to Buffalo next week.  69 bucks one-way, bitches.  So worth it. 

We're going to stop and see my gramps here on our way east.  Hopefully we'll be in Hingham by dinnertime.

Have a great holiday.

no hitting!

I read this blog post the the other day, re: Finslippy's less-than-ideal interactions with her (now fired) son's nanny.  The nanny hit or pushed the kid, and the kid fell down and scraped up his knees.  And the kid told his mom.  And then Finslippy fired the bitch. Who also turned out to be a crazy bitch.  Read it here - it's very interesting.

Finslippy was right to show Trixie the door.  Call me old-fashioned, but the only person who is going to hit my kid is me.  Just kidding, ha ha.  I know that sometimes it is hard to not hit Will, especially after he hits me, but I have learned that gritting my teeth and counting to 1,000 is much easier now than paying for the therapy in 5-10 years time which is when most abused children will start to get the help they need.  Or sooner, if they start setting fire to the neighbor's pets. 

I was a nanny once, for about 9 months during the last semester of my senior year in college and the following summer.  I nannied two kids, ages 5 and 8; the parents were rich and overworked and we all lived happily in a nice big mansion outside Boston. They actually called me an au-pair, not nanny, and during the school year I drove the kids to school and fed them and helped w/ homework, and spent the entire summer lounging by the pool at the Country Club while the kids were in tennis lessons and soccer camp.  I never even thought of hitting those kids, although sometimes they deserved it.  I used a lot of time-outs with them, and that is what I use with Will now.  The last time I hit Will (which was really no more than a little smack on the hand, so don't go calling DSS on me), instead of teaching him a lesson, I watched his gorgeous little face crumple up with shock and tears and unhappiness which then transferred over to me.   And I laid awake for most of that night feeling like the worst fucking mother in the world and made the determination that the naughty step is the way to go, from now on.

I'm lucky that I don't need a nanny, at least not now.  Will goes to daycare four days a week and the teachers there love him, and he loves them right back.  I've never been unhappy about the care he receives there.  He learns a lot and is very active and comes home happy, tired, sweaty and dirty - just like a little boy should.

Of course, someday I might need a nanny and that's when I'll force my mom to quit her job and work for me.

an apology to applebee's

Dear Applebee's,

I am writing to apologize for mocking you in previous blog posts.  I never meant any harm, and by calling you 'Crapplebee's', I was just poking fun at your mostly craptastic menu.  I mean, anyone can make spinach-artichoke dip, but only you can fuck it up by serving it with stale chips, right?  And those "Smothered Steaks" you offer?  Please stop with the smothering.  Shrimp and steak and CHEESE do not mix well at all and make me more than just a little sick when I see that on your menu.  I also think your 'Carside To Go' promotion is adding to our nation's growing problem with obesity - I mean, how hard is it to park and waddle in less than 50 feet to grab a bag of food? 

However, my last few visits to you have been quite lovely.  You see, here in the 14094 zipcode, we are limited to very few kid-friendly establishments, and Pizza Hut, Friendly's and McDonald's all have one problem - THEY DON'T SERVE COCKTAILS.  So, Applebee's it sometimes has to be.  I am happy to give you props for serving Weight Watcher's menu items, so all the fat ladies in Lockport like myself can stop with the baby carrots already and have a freaking bowl of soup or a sandwich.  The last time I went I had a nice salad (....and three margaritas which are most certainly not on the WW-approved menu items) and tonight....well, tonight I had the unusual and delicious Quesadilla Burger,  a tasty 'Southwest seasoned burger topped with cheddar and pepper-Jack cheeses, bacon, tomatos, red onion and jalapenos - all stuffed between grilled flour tortillas'  Hmmmm.  Also not Weight Watcher approved but so damn good.  Even if I will be stuck in the bathroom for the rest of the night.

Most sincerely,

Jen14221

P.S.  The $3.99 kid's menu is awesome but your sour apple sangria was pretty bad.  I knew it would be, I just wanted to spend 7 bucks to prove it to myself. 

sausage making

On Sundays, I don't like to do too much.  However, today I seemed to be non-stop.  My schedule last week was all off-kilter so I had to do lots of laundry today, as well as grocery shop and spend a lot of time in the kitchen.  Not exactly the lazy Sunday I usually dream about.

I did have time to read (most of) the paper.  Here's an interesting item I saw:

You've got to love the Buffalo News for having the most random items in the classifieds.  I was thinking about applying but am afraid that my skills in stuffing ground, stuffed, raw meat into casings on camera are a bit rusty - and the thought is making me feel a bit queasy.  If and when I have anything to do with sausages, I want them pre-cooked and put on my plate without a single thought from me as to how they came to be.

I did have a few hours of hot and humid fun in the kitchen today; for some reason I thought today was a great day to cook and bake.  I made this super B-O-T pasta (bacon/onion/tomato) pasta that we can pick at all week, and also tried to recreate the 'killer bean" dish I enjoyed at last weekend's party.  Pictures and recipes can be found here and here.  I suggest you wait until it's good and hot out when you make these for the full effect I had so much fun with today.

My parents came over for dinner, and we had the afore-mentioned killer beans, filet mignon, grilled corn and bruschetta w/ tomato/basil/mozzarella.  Afterwards, my kitchen was about 500 degrees and we all spontaneously burst into flames.

wine and soup

I'm heading out tonight, going downtown to meet my friend Michelle at Brodo.  Yum, wine and soup.  My two favourites.

Peter, on the other hand, is taking Will here.* 

I think I got the better deal.

*More on why Peter is taking Will to the "Magical Place for Family Fun" in a future post.

friday kid photo

I was supposed to go downtown tonight to meet up with a friend for drinks!  fun!  and excitement! but I am just too tired to even think about the drive there, let alone the ride back.  Will hopefully re-energize tonight and go out tomorrow, if she is not too pissed.  There's a lot going on right now...my work schedule and lots of stuff going on with Will does not always match up, and I seem to be waking up some mornings even more tired than I was when I went down.   We are leaving for a pilgrimage to Boston next Friday and I have a ton to do beforehand.  But I think there might be time for just a little nappy......zzzz.

exercise = death, or at least terrible itching and a nasty blister

I went on a walk tonight.  A real walk.  Sneakers, iPod, no kid - the whole shebang.  I walked like a mile and a half, maybe two miles.  And now I know why I do not do this very often. 

1) I am allegic to socks, and  2) I may be allergic to exercise

Seriously, I have a nasty blister on my toe and hives all over my feet, in a pattern of where my socks were.  I also do not like it when people in the hood recognize me and wave and honk at me when I am 'exercising' - it makes me twitch.  So, I may not be doing it again anytime soon.

I did enjoy my half hour of me time and rocking out to the '80's on my iPod.

catch-up

Oh my, there's been so much to blog about and here I've been writing about such boring things like my kid's IQ level and the mini.  Lame-o.

But this shit is good.

Britney:  WTF?  Nice boobs, nice hair, nice gum, nice ratty denim skirt, nice blob of mascara on your eyelid.  I tried to like you!  I really tried.  But this has gone too far.  Shape up.

Would you buy a t-shirt from this man?  Not if he's Screech.  If you squint a bit he looks a little like my boyfriend Patrick Demsey, but - oh no - it's Screech.  Trying to raise some dough to save his house.  Never mind.

I've been reading a lot.  There's not too much good TV on these days.  The Lockport Library is my friend.

I am starting to write my next piece for the Spree.  It's about moms who blog.  Maybe dads too. I'm hoping Peter will start a blog so I can just interview him and call it a day.

We're going to Boston in 10 days to celebrate the birth of our nation.  And the availability of delicious cheeses at Trader Joe's.

average

This morning, Will had a psychological examination.  No, no.  He's not in any trouble - nor am I.  It's all part of the early intervention program that we have been receiving services from since WIll was just a baby.  Due to his torticollis, we are eligible to receive treatment in the home which in his case includes physical therapy and stretching of his poor little neck.  Well, pretty soon he'll be transitioning to a new program (once he reaches three years old) and that's why we had the eval this morning.

Will did all the work, but I am the one stressed out here.

The psychologist graded Will on a number of factors, including how well he could build a tower of blocks exactly as she had done, if he could name certain items in a picture and if he could identify different things that she lined up all in a row.

Well, Will likes to use his blocks to build 'caterpillars' and make letters.  He really doesn't build towers, so to follow the teacher's example?  FAIL.  He could point to the teddy bear's eyes, feet, arms, etc. but could not identify the ribbon.  I'm not sure we ever used the term 'ribbon' before.  HE'S A BOY.  As for the items lined up in a row, he was good with 'car', 'horse' and 'pencil' but spaced on 'button' and he called the watch a 'clock'.  Also, when she asked him to pick up all the things that eat, I knew he would once again be named a FAILURE.

My kid knows all his ABC's and can count to 20 and count to 10 in Spanish on a good day.  He knows what a pentagon is.  He likes to page through the phone book to look for letters and numbers. So, I thought he was kind of a smartypants.  And now I am feeling a bit perturbed when I was told that my kid is of AVERAGE intelligence, in the 66% percentile and that I have nothing to worry about.

NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

I honestly thought Will was a genius.  I've said it many times and I will keep on saying it.  I feel really kind of sad right now and I am ready to smash the TV and start studying for the next psychological exam.

Or at least make him wear a ribbon once in awhile.

a swim, the mini and a big-ass bounce house

Yesterday's recap:

It's hot.  Damn hot.  I took Will next door for a dip in the pool (my neighbors rock!) and the little bugger had a blast.  My blonde streaks are turning a bit brassy.  Boo.

While Will napped, I took the mini out for a spin through the streets of 14094.  It's nice to have people point and laugh at you and know that it's not because of your fat ass.  For once!  Love that car, although not sure if it's worth the $900,000.00 spent in restoring it.  Plus, the brake lights don't seem to work.  Hmmmm.  It passed inspection so I'm not going to say anything.

After Will's nap, we ventured over to other neighbor's home for a graduation party.  Cocktails for adults; bounce house for kids.  Wil basically fended for himself for 4 hours, with minimal intervention by me and Peter (food, drink, tending to minor boo-boos).  He's 2 and a half and he is almost self-sufficient.  As soon as we get him potty trained I am sure he'll be ready to leave home.  Boo.

Today:  Me, hangover-free, hot (that pool is calling), father's day.  Cheese plate.  See ya.