jen's 14,221 thoughts

movie night

I think Next Stop Wonderland is one of the bext movies ever.  Well, that and Jaws.  And Fargo.

things that amuse me

Because I've just had three very large cocktails!

This is one of my crafty trays, but instead of bottlecaps, I trapped Fisher Price Little People in resin.  We had the neighbors over for drinks and snacks on Saturday (which means we basically set up a card table in the driveway and I mixed up a pitcher of lemonade and Cabana Bay Cherry Rum with maraschino cherries. 

This was Will's lunch on Saturday. It is very orange, no?

This picture was taken this evening outside my hotel room, Embassy Suites, 26th floor, near the elevator. Three fishies.  Were they dropped or arranged like that?

To prep for WLS on 6/9, I have to go on what is called a 'liver reduction diet'.  It does not mean that you should eat less liver.  This is $25 worth of high protein foods and supplements I bought at Trader Joe's today.  Protein is your friend, especially if you are about to have your stomach reconfigured and reattcahed to your duodenum.  Or something like that.

If I lived in Philadelphia full-time, I'd want to live on this street.  It's cute and small.

This makes me laugh and laugh.

So does this.

And this too.  Nice fucking neck scarf.

note(s) to self

• Whatever you need to do, it is NOT important enough to book the 5:40am flight from BUF to PHL.  It's too early and there is no first class.  What the hell were you thinking?
• Make sure you push and shove to be the first one on the plane so that you can stow your shit in the overhead bins directly over your seat.  Otherwise, you'll be sitting in seat 1F and your stuff will be all the way back in row 10.  Then, getting off the plane is a real bitch.
• Be extra nice to the bitchy male flight attendant.  If you complain about the cold air blowing on you, he may turn the AC on higher just to fuck with you.
• I repeat, do not take the 5:40am flight ever again.
• June 9th is going to be a day that lives in infamy.  Or at least something.  Gastric bypass, baby.

30-50% less jen14221

I've been approved.  Apparently those last few binge sessions and heavy shoes put me in a good spot.

JUST KIDDING!

I need to choose a date for the surgery but lookout for a smaller Jen14221 by Christmas 2008.  Size 10, here I come.  It's been a long fucking time.

racecars and wheelbarrels

Will loves (LOVES) to draw pictures of racecars.  Not bad, eh?

Up until a week ago, my husband - a 41 year-old man with an MBA - thought that the thing pictured below is called a wheelbarrel.  Not wheelbarrow. 

I think he also totally calls sherbet sherbert.

thank you novartis

I just had a very nice meal at Le Bec Fin in Philadelphia, sponsored by Novartis.  I went with a bunch of Pharmacists and pretended I knew what the speaker was talking about when he said that instances of edema blah blah blah were reduced blah blah blah when patients were blah blah blah Novartis. 

I have completed Day 2 of my go-live.  The night terrors are gone.  Daytime terrors are with me at all times.

I'm supposed to be typing up a status report outlining achievcements and challanges from today, but I think I am going to crash.  This is probably due to working 12 hours today with little sleep last night and several glasses of a tremendous red wine courtesy of Novartis.

sunday update

Peter and Will were here in Philadelphia with me, and now they're gone.

My sissy and her finacee were here too, but they're gone as well.

I am alone in my hotel room with a suitcase of dirty laundry, and I'm not going home until Thursday.

Oh, boo hoo hoo hoo hoo.

crazy shit in philadelphia

This morning as I waited on the 19th and Market St. platform for the subway, a man dropped trou and peed against the wall.  While I stood right there. 

I am experiencing go-live night terrors. 

The Embassy Suites lost my bag.  The bag I keep at the Embassy Suites, and have checked every weekend for over a year, the one with all my toiletries and gym clothes, the one with my makeup and perfume and all the other shit I don't want to lug back and forth?  Yeah, it's gone.  I hope whoever has it really enjoys my Crest Whitestrips and old sports bra.  Bitches.

My husband and son are driving down tomorrow to join me in go-live night terrors and lack of shampoo and moisturizer, and the weather forecast is shit for the next 5 days.

And I am going to have a drink.  Right now.  I am so not taking the subway to the bar.

sniffly, sticky sunday

I have allergies or something.  My nose is red and raw.

I am making soda cap trays like mad.  Resin is so not my fucking friend these days.  Nothing is curing properly or on time.  Plus, the resin is all over the place.

I sold $267 worth of crafty stuff on Friday!

Tomorow, I am going to Philadelphia for ELEVEN days.  I fear for the state of my home, and how it will look when I return on MAY NINTH.

random philadelphia images

The fountain in LOVE park.  Yes, the water is green.  I am not sure why.

Random bleachers set up on Benjamin Franklin Boulevard.  I'm not sure why.

This bike frame has been here since November 2006.  I've been keeping track.

My dinner last night.  That Singapore Sling was delicious.

not a good sign on a monday

I walked into work this morning and this is what showed on my laptop screen:

where i amuse myself

The May issue of Buffalo Spree is out and my Blog Cabin article in on-line.  Enjoy.

I actually love this one; I just re-read it and made myself laugh.

I think I may have had a buzz when I wrote it.

hulu.com

There is no time for the Friday Kid Photo when all I can think about is HULU.  Did you know you can watch full-length episodes of Fantasy Island and Remington Steele on your PC?  For FREE? 

This is a good one.

thursday, oh thursday, how I love you so very much

It's Thursday!  I'm going home!  I am going to try to catch the 2:45 flight!  I'll be home for dinner!  Peter!  What are you cooking?!

I had a moderately successful week at work, I got a lot of things done and I am getting ready for a go-live on May 5th, which I sincerely hope not to fuck up. 

I was ill on Monday, which I was sure had a lot to do with the soup I had for Monday lunch but later found out that Peter, Will, and the next-door neighbor all had the same dealio and I guess it was just a bug.  Tuesday was weak but yesterday was GLORIOUS!  I was productive and I had an amazing dinner and the weather here in Philadelphia was sunny and nice.  My back still hurts and my Achilles Tendon is a broken rubberband, but painkillers seem to help.  A LOT.

So, nothing much to crab about today....stay tuned though...tomorrow is another day.

in a world of hurt

I have no idea what I've done to myself but I suddenly feel like I am 90 years old and on death's door.  I have injured my lower back in some way, not sure how, but I have a throbbing something going on and sometimes the pain i sso bad it makes me sick to my stomach, especially right after I've eaten.  I've been to see a chiropractor Friday and today and had various body parts popped and pulled.  Still hurts.

Now, my Achilles Tendon feel like that scene in Hostel when the dude gets his ankles sliced open by the bad guy.  Have you seen that movie?  It's bad.  Anyway, that's what my left foot feels like.  So, I go up and down stairs one at a time, sideways, and I can't bend over because of my back. 

Not a pretty sight.

friday kid photo

We have reached success here in the Wutz-Lopes household.  Will now eats an additional food - soup.  It has to be Campbell's brand Cars shapes chicken noodle, and he ignores the chicken and carrots, but it's a new food, people.

I'll take what I can get.

neck scarf debate

So, I've had this little Burberry scarf for a few years.  It came in a package with a little bitty Burberry makeup case that my sissy gave me as a gift.  I've always wanted to wear it, but I thought it might not work for me.  But this week I decided to bit the bullet and just wear it.  What do you think?

I asked several people at work and they said things like "it's okay" and "I don't care so shut it", but would like YOUR opinion.  Just like in days of old.

random wednesday listing

• I am supporting an enormous go-live at LMNOP company this week.  I am on my feet all day and and I am wearing these shoes.  I am seriously stupid.
• Lots of people think I should just get over myself and join Weight Watchers.  Why, thank you.
• I have this crazy lower back pain that started up last week and I am so getting a massage tonight.
• Philadelphia is experiencing a phenomenon where gangs of punk-ass kids are attacking commuters on the subways in the afternoon, I assume when school lets out.  I have taken a cab every day this week and do not plan to stop nor do I care what my expense report looks like at the end of the week.
• I love my iPhone, and I am newly addicted to Twitter.

saturday kid photo

Will loves him some 'val-lilla' ice cream.

new shoes

My friend Todd says my blog is nothing but snapshot of my feet and my purses.  This one is for him.

They have absolutely no support so my Podiatrist would so not approve but they were too cute to pass up.

fat camp

Full disclosure time.

Long time readers of the blog know that I have a few issues, shall we call them, with my weight.  I went on my first diet at 13.  I've tried starvation, bulimia, Fen-Phen, Slim-Fast and Trim-Spa to lose weight.  I've done the diet-and-exercise thing and have lost a lot, and then gained it all back and then some.  I've marked many significant events in my life with not what was happening, but how much I weighed.  Fourteenth birthday?  Weight 113  High school graduation?  Weight 129.  College graduation?  Weight 158.  Wedding day?  Weight 189.  Birth of son?  Weight 225.  Current weight?  Too much.  Now, my knees are shot, I've got back pain that won't quit, and you all know about the plantar fucking faciitis.  I've looked into some permanent tools to help me on my journey to a better life of health and happiness (doesn't that sound like horseshit from the Biggest Loser or something?) and guess what?  I went to see the Bariatric Surgeon today.  And I am going to have Weight Loss Surgery.  Gastric Bypass, baby.  Hopefully my insurance company will approve it but if they don't, I will take out a loan or something.  Does anyone have 23 grand they can lend me?  Thanks.

vacation snappies

Flying First Class is really the only way to go.  Even if you are 4.

Will and I wade (and watch out for sharks).

Peter enjoys a $12 beer on the beach.

I had no idea that Busch Gardens was THAT Busch.  Dummy.

They charged us $198 (including tax, 2 adults and 1 child) to get in, but they did give out free beer.  Yuzza.

I think Will got his money's worth.

And Will has two new friends.  These kids belong to my friend Tammy, someone I have known for almost 30 years.

back from Tampa

Vacation was great.  We are back.  First class seats are the best.  I may kill my son.  Not really.  Pictures to come tomorrow.

happy, home

I am happy.  I am home.  We're going on vacation tomorrow.

blog anniversary alert

Yep, it's my anniversary.

I've been blogging crap and nonsense for four years.

First post ever.  Check out baby Will!

First anniversary post - eh, there isn't one.  We were in Orlando.

Yeast infections and Mighty Taco.  Second anniversary post.

Third anniversary post - random listing of random stuff.

easter aftermath

It's Monday morning, 9am, and I am here in Philadelphia.  I may or may not have packed underwear, but we'll just have to wait and see on that until later. 

Dinner yesterday was a huge success, as you can see.

There was way too much of everything left over (I think only one person besides the boy had ziti, but oh, well.) and everyone got to take leftovers home with them.

Here's Meredith and Yordanis.  Wedding date:  9/5/09!

happy easter

Will finally did drop off to sleep last night, and Peter left his mistress at about 11pm and made it home by 1am.  Will woke up early and started searching for his basket.

He found it.

He liked it.

He got Cars viewmaster thingies, and lots of other stuff.

And we all sat and relaxed for a moment.  But I had no time to linger over coffee, in my cute new Easter coffee cup.  I had shit to do.

Like make bacon/cheddar devilled eggs.

Clean and trim the green beans.  This took 10 years.  Next time I am going back to canned, baby.

And prep the grilled pineapple.  Here's Step 1.

Step 2.  Mix the glaze - brown sugar, cherry rum and orange juice.  Usually I would probably use plain or dark rum, but the cherry stuff was right in front.

Marinate.  Later, I will ask Peter to grill it.  If I don't just scarf it down right now.

I set the table.

Will eats lunch while I prepare the corn casserole, peel the potatos and clean and trim the asparagus.  He has all his little Cars friends with him, as you can see.

Peter brought these from Toronto.  Perhaps his girlfriend is a pastry chef?

"Hah, that's funny.  I wish."

saturday kid photo (and more)

Today, Peter went to Toronto to visit his mistress and I hung out with Will.  After swimming lessons this morning, we colored eggs because it was time, and I was tired of hearing this MOMMY CAN WE PLEASE COLOR EGGS NOW IT WILL BE EASTER SOON AND I NEED TO COLOR EGGS WITH YOU PLEASE MOMMY EGGS EGGS EGGS MUST COLOR EGGS.

Then they dried (MOMMY ARE THE EGGS DRY YET I NEED TO PUT STICKERS ON MY EGGS WHEN WILL THEY BE DRY PLEASE MOMMY CAN YOU CHECK TO SEE IF THEY ARE READY WHY IS IT TAKING SO LONG MOMMY PLEEEEEASE HEY WHERE ARE MY STICKERS).

Note to readers:  I finally broke out the hair dryer to dry the damn eggs.  And Will stuck 32 Cars stickers on one egg.

Then the mail came, and it was awesome.

Package of fun and personalized stationary from JustJenn.  Who rocks.

Then I did the following:

• Cooked three pounds of five-cheese potatoes
• Washed and folded 4 loads of laundry
• Made 2 dozen meatballs
• Boiled ziti
• Assembled baked ziti with meatballs (not a traditional Easter dish, I know, but I know it's something the boy will eat)
• Drove to Williamsville with Will for dinner with the fam
• Drove home
• Unwrapped and carried the table leaves up from the basement and shoved 'em on in.
• Ditto for three dining chairs.  Ooops, we're still short two chairs.
• Started setting the table; I hope we have enough forks.
• Convinced Will that the Easter bunny won't come until he's asleep.  YES, JUST LIKE SANTA CLAUS DAMMIT GO TO SLEEP.
• Hid his Easter basket under the dining room table
• Blogged

Tomorrow I need to make the ham, mashed potatoes, asparagus, green beans, corn casserole, devilled eggs and remember to send Peter to the store for beer.

Then, on Monday, I FLY TO PHILADELPHIA AT 7AM GOD HELP ME.

friday list

1. The Ratner family has a new addition!  Welcome baby Vivienne!  You'd better be all nice and calm and sleepng through the night when we see you in August in the Outer Banks.
2. While shopping at Wegman's this morning, I was standing in line to check out when a manager-type told me to go down to one of the Express 15 Items or Fewer lanes.  So I did.  And the dirty looks I got from all the bitches who got in line behind me with two items were priceless.
3. I went to Target yesterday too, and walked out without buying a single thing.  I was so not in the mood, I guess.
4. Plantar Faciitis is back, in full force.
5. We went to the hockey game tonight; we were gifted with very nice seats, in the $200 range.  And the Sabres lost anyway.

usair is fucking with me again

I bought myself a membership to the USAir Club again this year.  It's an "airport oasis for the busy traveler, featuring all the amenities of a business center and all the comforts of home"*  Except for the mice running around the Philadelphia club, and Jim Kelly making me blush at the Buffalo club, I like it.  They help me when my flights are cancelled or delayed, they have free snacks, and sometimes I have a nice drinkie while relaxing in a comfy chair.

*that's from their website.

I'm not sure what the dealio was today, because they usually have CNN on, but this afternoon they were showing Yo Gabba Gabba.

I totally already saw this one.